You Are More

I was recently talking to someone where they said "I am a professional ... "(fill in the blank however you see fit). It got me to thinking.

Some people know exactly what they want to be from day one. And that's great. Those people have found their passion & have fought tooth & nail to make those dreams come true.

Some people bounce back & forth between ideas, schools, & jobs, yet still they have no clue what they really want to do in life. They just end up working whatever job pays more. And many of them are happy that way.

Some people start on one path in life only to be derailed or rerouted somewhere else. It's not what they expected, planned, or even wanted, but they learn that the new path is just as good, if not better,  than the original.

For so many years, when asked about what I do, I found myself saying "I'm just a mom" or "I'm just a substitute teacher". When asked about my life, I usually end up talking about my kids or my husband. Afterall, who they are or what they do seems so much more interesting than what I do.

But I've realized that I am more! I am more than just a mom. I am Austin, Makenzie, & Logan's mom! Someone else might be "more qualified" or more efficient. But no one could ever love them more! God handpicked me, ME to be their mom.

I am more than just a preacher's wife, a paramedic's wife. I am Justin's wife. God joined our hearts together 20 years ago so we could walk hand in hand through this journey.

And although I still may just be "the sub" for the day, I absolutely love my job. I love so many of those kids like they were my own & I know they love me as well. Where else can you walk through the door & get bombarded by teenagers happy to see you? Certainly not your own house most days.

So whatever your title, whether it be a Doctor, a Lawyer, a Trash Collector, a Maintenance Man, a Mom, a Dad, wear that title with honor & know that God has a plan for your life. He has handpicked YOU to do things that NO ONE else can do.

I'm thankful that God has allowed me to be a mom, a wife, & a sub. It may not mean anything to you, but it sure does me.

It's Game Day Y'all

In towns all across America, people are gearing up for tonight. Months of hard work will finally be showcased tonight. Those hard working men (& some women) will finally be able to show off what they've learned, how they've grown, be seen under the lights, & have their names echo from the stands. And for a few moments, those ordinary, everyday youngins can feel like stars!

Those Friday Night Lights are legendary, especially in small towns in the south.

We are gearing up for our 11th football season. It takes over your time, your money, your car, your laundry. It takes away your voice, takes away your breath, & steals your heart.

As always, we start every season with hopes & dreams. Hope for a good season, hope for no injury, hope for success, & dreams of championships & glory.

This year is a little different for us, well for me anyway. I start this year with the same hopes & dreams, but mixed with anxiety, concern, & trepidation. (For the record, I'm not sure where the word trepidation came from. I'm not sure I've ever used it before, but as this post was flowing through my head, so was the word trepidation. So there you go.)

It was only a year ago that I watched, helplessly, as our family went through the biggest trial we've ever experienced. All because of a stupid decision during opening week of football.

I can't help but worry.

Even though I've seen my son grow. I've seen him change. I've seen him walk away from fights when I know his temper was boiling. I've seen him break up fights so others wouldn't get hurt or in trouble. I've seen him hit the altar at church with tears in his eyes. I've heard him call home from church camp absolutely broken about how good God has been. I've seen him make hard decisions that I know at the time he questioned. I've heard "I'm sorry for the hell I've put you through mom".

I've also heard the laughter return to his voice. I've heard joy & excitement when he talks about things. I've seen more friends coming back around. I've seen him opening back up. I've seen less worry & stress on his face. I've seen his eyes light up.

I can't help but worry.

After last season, he swore he wasn't playing again. My heart hurt. It hurt for him. It hurt for me. It hurt for missed opportunities & making memories. It hurt for regrets.

We have a brand new start this year. A brand new year, a brand new team, a brand new number (oh mercy kid, pick a number & stick with it), a brand new coach, a brand new set of plays, a brand new principle.

A brand new hope.

Don't mind me. I'll be the one praying fervently, screaming my head off, & ringing the cow bell for all I'm worth.

So here's to another football season & those Friday night lights.

I’m Thankful for Smoke Detectors at 2am

Have you ever be woken up in the middle of the night by your smoke detector? It’s kind of a weird feeling. You’re sleepy, you’re disoriented, you’re heart is pounding, you’re scared of the unknown.

That sound at that time is usually one of a parent’s worst nightmares. That might usually be the case, but it wasn’t mine. At least it wasn’t last night.

Last night, when my smoke detector woke me from a sound sleep at around 2am, I couldn’t help but smile a little.

I smiled because I smelled a familiar smell about 45 minutes earlier. And yes, that smell woke me up as well.

As I opened my bedroom door, through the smoky haze, I see one teenage boy asleep on the couch, oblivious to everything around him, I see one laughing hysterically on the floor, and I see my oldest son frantically fanning the smoke detector saying “sorry Mom”. It was 2am, they are teenagers, and they were hungry. They set the smoke detector off cooking a pizza (which reminds me... again... I really need to clean the oven).

So today, I’m thankful for friends, food, and working smoke detectors. But most of all I’m thankful that these boys were at my house texting girls & eating everything in the house instead of being out somewhere getting into trouble.

I would much rather be woken up from laughter & smoke detectors than from worry, fear, & dread. I pray that they always feel comfortable enough to walk through my doors without knocking & to help themselves to the junk food stash like its their own.

Lord, keep them safe, it’s a hard world out there.