Monday, November 11, 2013

But I'm a Preacher's Wive

I recently had a run in with someone who had some pretty nasty things to say about me. It's not the first time someone has talked about me & I'm sure it won't be the last time.

I normally don't pay much attention to what people say or think about me. Most of the time, there isn't a whole lot of truth to their ramblings anyway.

But this girl really bothered me. Sad part is, I don't really know her & she sure doesn't know me, so why should it even matter.

This person attacked my faith, that's why. She told me I was a poor excuse for a preacher's wife. She told me that my husband was leading people to Hell if he was anything like me. She had plenty of negative things to say about my life.

I know that she was just lashing out. And I am certainly not the first to be the recipient of her anger. I'm not sure if it was jealousy or just pure meanness. It doesn't really matter. What does matter is that I know the truth, God knows the truth, & my loved ones know the truth.

In light of that recent confrontation, I would like to help you understand a preacher's family a little bit more.

My husband has been called of God to preach the holy word. He has been called to lead a congregation of followers. 

That doesn't make him perfect. That doesn't mean he never makes mistakes. That doesn't give him permission to whip anyone while he stands holier than thou.

That does mean he deserves respect. It does mean that he has to examine his own life before he preaches a message to help clean up someone else's. It does mean that his life isn't nearly as private as yours might be.

It also means that sometimes he has to tell you things he doesn't feel comfortable saying when he finds out your private sins. It also means that sometimes he spends more time away from his family than with it. It means that his heart is always burdened down over your needs even when he has his own problems to worry about. 

Being a preacher's wife doesn't mean that I wear dresses all the time. It doesn't mean that my life is always sunshine and rainbows. It doesn't mean that my house is spotless.

It doesn't mean that I am perfect. It doesn't mean I believe I am better than you. 

It does mean that I reverence my husband & God's house. It does mean that I try to teach my kids about God. It does mean that you are welcome at our house even with all of its clutter & sticky floors.

It does mean that I mess up daily. It does mean that I still sin. It means I lose my temper just like you do, but most of the time, nobody sees when you get aggravated.

It also means that if I act a little stand offish, it's not because I don't like you. It's because I'm scared of getting close to someone who could turn on me & my family in a heartbeat. It means that even though I am praying for you, I need you to pray for me as well.

Being a preacher's kid isn't the easiest job either. Again, it doesn't mean they are perfect. It doesn't mean they love going to church all the time. It doesn't mean they always choose God.

Being a preacher's kid means they are still a kid. It means they WILL mess up because we are all still human. We are all still growing & learning.

Being a preacher's kid also means that more likely than not, they will rebel from what they have been taught all of their lives. It means they have to learn on their own the lessons we are trying to teach them. It also means that people are much quicker to point out their faults & failures even though their children are doing the very same thing.

So you see, being a part of a preacher's family doesn't make us any better than you, but being a Christian does make us forgiven. Being in a preacher's family doesn't mean that we mess up more or less than your family does. It means that more people are watching our lives and looking for those mistakes.

Being part of a preacher's family really doesn't make us any more or less special, any more or less different, any more or less dysfunctional, any more or less stressed than your family. Being a part of a preacher's family just means we are who God designed us to be.

Now that you know we aren't that different, take a few minutes to pray for our family & for your own preacher's family the next time you feel we don't meet your expectations. Remember God isn't done with us yet!

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