A Beautiful White Change of Pace

Yet again, here in NC we are experiencing snow. Not the Snow-Mageddon or the Snowpocalypse that we experienced last year, but just enough to sled on.

The first flakes of the season hit last week just as the kids were coming off of a long weekend and the frigid temps allowed it to hang around for a few days. Then after one day back to school with a 2 hour delay, we awoke to an unexpected "dusting" that produced several inches and 2 more days out of school. Now we are staring at the possibility of another storm that will shut down the world the rest of the week.

I read Facebook & can't help but laugh. Some are excited, some are disgusted, some are angry, & some are begging for a change. We sure are a fickle lot! NO ONE is ever happy!

I get it, I really do. The snow is fun for a little while, but it does tend to throw things helter skelter. And we sure do like things to go according to plan.

Now don't get me wrong, my kids have gotten on my nerves more than once, I have washed & dried & dried & dried about 3 times as much laundry, my floors are a mess, I have towels lining the entryways, & we are out of snacks...again. But for the most part I have thoroughly enjoyed this beautiful mess.

You see since this summer we have been none stop! Between Justin, Austin, & Makenize, we literally had football 6 days a week for months! Then we went right into wrestling season with Justin as the high school trainer there too. So again, many weeks, we had wrestling 6 days out of 7. Add to that tutoring & a few clubs for Makenzie, plus church activities and several other things going on, WE HAVE BEEN BUSY!

So last week was very much welcomed at our house. We ate supper at the table more times than we didn't. We cuddled on the couch watching movies. We sledded under the moonlight. We played Monopoly for hours on end. We baked brownies & muffins. ***We also cleaned the house!***

So instead of looking at this upcoming system as a burden & dreading it, look at it through the eyes of your child & take advantage of the time it has created for you! God does try to help us slow down sometimes!

 

Hello Juvenile Delinquent

I have wrestled with whether or not to post this one. Usually I'm an open book, no holds barred type of person. But this subject, while it could easily happen to any one of you, will probably cause lots of talk. So welcome to another edition of my less than perfect life...

As some of you know, there was an "incident" with Austin earlier this month. Now, my oldest isn't a fighter by nature, but he isn't one to back down either...ever. As we are learning, he can certainly hold his own. Long story short: a friend of Austin's started it, Austin finished it, resulting with the friend needing medical attention & glue.

Its never a good day when the school shows up on my caller id. But what started out as dread, turned into full fledged panic with more questions than answers.

Since there was "serious injury", the county, NOT the school or the other family, HAD to press charges. Because of a situation that started out as nothing more than boys being boys, now both of these 12 year old BOYS were being charged with misdemeanor assault!

Great...now I have a juvenile delinquent. At 16, sure maybe, but 12!!!

After the shock wore off, talking to the other family (who we are also friends with), and getting a few more answers, we were able to try to laugh about the whole incredible ordeal.

Even through the jokes, worry still remained. What would the juvenile protection services say, would there be long term repercussions, counseling, community service, worse?

After 10 L O N G days, we finally had our meeting. Since this was his first offense, all went well & the case was dismissed.

I think part of her job is to scare the pants off of kids.

While talking with this woman, we learned so many shocking things.

Did you know that the school refers every case involving fights, weapons, & drugs? EVERY ONE OF THEM! Including 6 year olds who through something across the room!!!

At any given time, there are 250 children (under 16 - because 16 is legally an adult here in NC) in this county on probation! REALLY??!!??!! Is that necessary?!

It shocks me to think that the school no longer wants any part of trying to help children that truly need help. While our case was nothing in the grand scheme of it all, I just can't imagine what some of these families go through just because the powers that be don't want to deal with it.

If my oldest child, who is not, nor ever has been, a saint, gets into another fight, whether he starts it or just defends himself, (which let's face facts, most boys do fight) he will be right back in that office facing stricter consequences.

Its a sad time we live in folks. Children can no longer be children, they can't try to settle things between themselves, they can no longer take up for themselves, without threats of legal action looming over their heads.

Of yeah, and my juvenile delinquent goes to church, plays football, wrestles, makes good grades, plays guitar, rides dirt bikes, & ties bow-ties just for fun!

Goodbye 2014 & Praying for 2015

With the new year upon us, I like to look back on all that transpired during 2014. I can say, with all honesty that we faced things we have never faced before. We experienced new joys, higher highs, & lower lows. Through it all, we are still BLESSED!

2014 brought with it a brand new business, Freedom Fire & Safety, that we are slowly building to its great potential. It brought the best year yet for Blessed Boutique. It brought a new car (finally), parenting struggles, the death of my grandfather, the resignation of a church, a FULLY self employed year (which scares the daylights out of me as tax time gets closer). It brought, not once or twice, but three occasions that brought my mom to church. It brought not one, but two, Super Bowl championships to my children. It brought the opportunity to hear, meet, & shake the hand of one of my favorite singers. It brought new friendships, while others ended. And hopefully, it brought my family closer to each other & to God than ever before.

One of the (many) things that I regret about this past year is the fact that I didn't write nearly as much as I have in the past (only 41 posts in 2014 compared to over 150 in 2013). I just had so many tangled emotions that I felt were best left unsaid at the time. But hopefully 2015 will bring clarity & freedom with it.

We did see 2014 out with a bang & a prayer. We started revival last night at Maple Springs (which will continue through Friday! Come join us!!) then prayed in the New Year at a friend's house. And what New Year's celebration is complete (at least around here) without fireworks & gun shots!

Now a few of my favorite posts from this past year. These have nothing to do with number of views, comments, etc. These are the ones I enjoyed the most, the ones I learned the most from, the ones that moved me to tears.

The one that surprised me the most this year was Weary Mom, I feel You It honestly started out as a venting session. I was so aggravated the day I wrote it, but I had no idea just how many people would need to hear they are not alone!

Another special one was Leaps & Bounds. She's still growing & I'm so thankful for that!

100 Happy Days wasn't one of my favorite "blog posts" but the result of it was. That simple post, that simple decision, brought with it an entire summer of purposefully looking for something EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. to make me smile. Some days, I had several things to share, some days, I struggled to find just one. But I faithfully posted a picture to my Instagram about being happy for 100 days!

I Wonder What He's Thinking reminded me just how similar parenting must be to God trying to direct our paths.

Country Must be Country Wide was special just because it had so many fun memories with it! And I have never been featured on someone's website before!!

And of course, no year would be complete without all the fun adventures of Twinkle the elf. So check out all the insanity that the Elf on the Shelf brings with it.

Finally So I Write tells the dark side of me.

I hope that you enjoyed sharing 2014 with us. My goal is that something I said made you laugh, cry, grow, shake your head, or empathize with not just me, but those around you as well. I pray that 2015 will be your (and my) best year ever!

Love you all!!

I Wonder What He's Thinking

Its been far too long. I've had several things on my mind & on my heart, but not the words or the desire to express them.

But tonight, its like a flood gate has been opened up. Its funny. That's how it always comes, when I know that God is using me to tell a story.

I learned something tonight. Well, its not the first time that I've been "taught" this lesson, but it was a gentle reminder that stopped me in my tracks.

While having a discussion with Austin tonight, I was forced to stand my ground. We have always taught our children that when they start something, they will finish it. If, after its over, they never want to do that thing again, then its fine. But we are not quitters. When we make a commitment, we stick to it. Other people are counting on us. We need to be dependable.

Tears were cried, voices were raised, words that weren't meant were said, but when it was all over & done, we were able to hug, apologize, & say I love you.

It was in those moments as I was calling out to God for direction, guidance, & strength that Austin came back to me. I cried even harder as my baby, who is no longer a baby, my baby, who is taller than me now, laid his head on my chest & cried as he hugged me & apologized.

My heart is breaking because he is unhappy, but there's a lesson here for both of us.We both need to learn to stand by what we say. We also need to stop before we act.

I wonder if I break God's heart as often as my children break mine?

I wonder if He cries as many tears over me as I do over them?

I wonder if He questions my love for Him just as I question theirs for me?

I wonder if He wonders if I will ever change/learn/grow up? If He's done the right thing by allowing me to make the choices I do?

I KNOW that God doesn't make mistakes, but a mother's love is the closest thing that compares to God's love so you can't help but think about how His heart aches for us.

The Fall of an American Hero

It hit me a little harder yesterday. The history. The battles. The joy. The pain. The sadness. The life.

Papa Roscoe's 90th Birthday 9-9-12

As I walked down the hall, I tried to smile. I tried to offer encouragement to those around me. I tried not to think about how bleak it all looked.

When I got to the door, I stopped short. I appreciated the flag placed outside the door next to his name, but it made me sad. The colorful cards, the thank you's written in that bright playful sloppy hand writing that can only belong to a child, did little to lighten up the room.

Logan's 2nd Birthday Party 6-13

When I entered the room, those light blue eyes that have seen so many things in the past 91 years, brightened up just a little bit. The laugh lines etched in his weathered face deepened from the surprise visit of his oldest grandbaby and youngest great-grandbaby.

Logan's 2nd Birthday Party 6-13

It was hard on me to see my once strong, independent grandfather sitting in that wheel chair in his private room at the nursing home. Its hard to hold onto those hands that have been calloused over time and again from mending fencing and working in the garden. Its hard hearing that rough voice that for more years than I can count, called to cows every evening at feeding time. Its hard knowing that this man is the one & the same who once stormed the beaches of Normandy during World War II 69 years ago.

Christmas 1989

After a recent urinary tract infection and short stay in the hospital, Papa needs therapy to build his strength back up. I'm not sure how long he will be there, but I can't help but wonder if this will become his permanent home. This was the same nursing home where my grandmother spent some of her last days 11 years ago. You can see that those memories are still haunting him.

50th Wedding Anniversary 1996

Unfortunately, I had to leave all too soon. I leaned down, hugged his neck, & told him I loved him. His response, as always was "yeah". I don't think I have ever heard him tell anyone he loved them, but we all know he does.

I managed to make it out of his room before the tears started falling.

Today, November 11, 2013 is Veteran's Day. I am thankful for both of my grandfathers, my uncle, my daddy, & countless others who have served, fought, & died to provide a better place for me, my children, & one day, my children's children. I am thankful today & everyday for those who so bravely stood up for a cause they were willing to die for.

What's One More Thing

Well, its that time again. Its time for the Ultimate Blog Challenge.

If you will remember, I flooded your newsfeeds with LOTS of posts in July when I last took part in this. I was unsure as I wrapped up the month if I would sign up for it again. I was still unsure when I signed up to do it again last night. I am still unsure even as I sit here writing.

My life has been crazy busy & complicated lately - even more so than normal!

We ALWAYS are overbooked every fall. Between football & cheerleading, there really isn't much room for anything else. Well, this year, we have added 2 different school schedules (public school & homeschool). We have added Justin not only helping to coach Austin's football team, but also being the athletic trainer for the high school football team, which means that he has to be at every practice right after school as well as every JV & Varsity game, both home & away.

Its that time of year where my home business picks up. I am up to my ears in ribbon, tulle, & bottlecaps trying to stock up for the Apple Festival, various fall festivals, vendor events, & Christmas orders.

I have also recently started another business. I have become an Ambassador with Plexus Slim. I am working so hard at trying to build this business into something lucrative so I can help our family.

Add to all of this, the every day chores around the house, the demands of being a pastor's wife, & the requirements of a homeschool teacher and it seems so overwhelming right now.

So I still wonder if trying to write 30 blog posts in 30 days was the smartest decision.

Now don't get me wrong, I LOVE writing my blog! I LOVE hearing from someone how much I have encouraged them! I LOVE knowing that God is using ME through something that I enjoy!

I just don't EVER want to feel like I HAVE to do this! Then it becomes a J O B & not many people enjoy their jobs.

So bare with me while I attempt another challenge. Bare with me if some days life takes over & I don't get to post. Bare with me if occasionally something I write doesn't make as much sense as it did in my head.

Bare with me if I don't make it to 30. I'm going to give it my best effort, but if I fall short, remember I am human & bare with me!

3 Generations of Heroes

My husband is one of my heroes. Not only because of what he does Every. Single. Day. for our family, but literally because he is a hero.

Justin joined his local volunteer fire department as a Junior Fireman when he was only 13 years old. Of course, he couldn't help out much until he turned 18, but those beginning years provided valuable training, taught him about teamwork, and instilled in him a love for helping others. I believe this was one of the contributing factors to leading him down the road towards becoming an EMT. He has had an active role in the fire department ever since.

It wasn't long after Justin joined, that his father saw the benefits from this organization. This encouraged Tony to sign up as well.

Justin's mom has always played an active role in helping the fire department anyway she could, but it wasn't until a few years ago that she officially became a fireman woman. Other members of our family are also volunteers out there, including cousins, my brother in law, my niece, and many friends that we consider family.

Austin has always loved going to training, running calls, & just hanging out at the fire station with anyone who would let him tag along. I knew the day was fast approaching when he would join their ranks.

Sure enough, his daddy finally gave in & let Austin turn in his application to become a Junior Fireman. He is beyond excited!

I'm happy for him. But, that sure gives me something else to worry about!

So, here's saying a prayer for all of our men, women, boys, & girls who are our heroes today & dream of being our heroes in the future.

A New Discovery

I am exhausted!

I'm still tired even though it's the next day!

It's been a while since I have been this bone tired.

I took the kids to The Discovery Place in Charlotte yesterday. Have you ever been? Oh you NEED to go!! This was our first time & I was overwhelmed!

By looking at the map of the museum, it honestly doesn't look that big. BUT, once you get there, the fun just keeps going & going & going (especially the 2nd floor)!

They have a special room for kids under 7 to play, explore, & run around. It took Logan all of 2 minutes once we entered this area to become soaking wet while playing in the water area. OOPS, I didn't anticipate that. Oh well, it didn't seem to bother him.

There were many different areas where the kids could learn about all sorts of animals, from fish to birds to frogs. We dissected owl pellets, tried to balance eggs like a penguin, & examined molted parts of a tarantula under a microscope. They even got to touch horseshoe crabs, starfish, & a snake.

They made creations out of duct tape. laid on a bed of nails, propelled themselves into the air with a rocket chair, & tried to lift their body weight through a series of pulleys. We balanced balls on columns of air, sent shredded paper into a vacuum & flying into the air, & played tug of war.

They learned how to build shelters & why it is necessary. We built, knocked down, & rebuilt various structures out of blocks. We played trivia games & tried to figure out where in the world they were just from a picture. They learned that germs are everywhere.

They played in a submarine, found out which bugs were the slimiest, learned just how gross flies really are. We tried to save frogs from certain doom, fought bug against bug in order to have bragging rights, & saw the inside workings of a cow's numerous stomachs. They matched animals to their piles of poop & were completely surprised by how long tape worms really are.

We watched a turtle's trip to paradise & saw lions in Africa up close & personal. We watched fire change colors.

Can you tell we all had a great time?!

The best part about it, they were learning without realizing it!

We could easily spend a whole week trying to learn and investigate everything The Discovery Place had to offer. I think I'll make my hubby go next time too.

Our 4th of July Festivities

I thought about posting this earlier with a look at what I "wanted" to do just in case people needed ideas for celebrating. But I decided instead to give you a glimpse of what we actually did.

This year, the 4th of July holiday turned into a 4 day weekend for us. Justin took off on Thursday & Friday, & then amazingly we didn't have ANYTHING planned for Saturday! It was nice not having to be somewhere.

We had a cookout Thursday with friends & family. Check out my Patriotic Punch! I was so excited that this actually worked. The taste wasn't that great, but then again, I don't like Sprite so I wasn't too surprised. I also took the time to make a strawberry flag poke cake & chocolate dipped marshmallows & pretzels.

I found some really cool patriotic music to listen too from Amazon. And here performed by the US Marine Band. Best of all, it was FREE! Austin was not too impressed though.

We worked on our missionary study Around the World in 60 Days. (I'll add a link later after we have completed it. Check back at the end of August.)

We made firework paintings.

Justin read the Declaration of Independence & we even signed a pledge saying that we would. In return, we are getting a free copy mailed to us!

No summer celebration is complete without a trip to Stone Mountain for fishing, swimming, & ice cream! The water was WAY up and much colder than normal due to all the rain lately. The current was very swift as well, so Austin caught the only fish ... with his HAND.

I Think I Will Take a Little Vacation Too

My oldest 2 kids have been attending Vacation Bible School at a neighboring church this week. They always enjoy going to Bible School, but they especially look forward to this one. This is a large church that a lot of their friends attend, so they learn biblical truths while rekindling friendships. Its a win win.

I have enjoyed myself this week as well. I have so much that is screaming for my attention right now that I'm having a hard time concentrating.

I am participating in the Ultimate Blog Challenge which is overworking my creativity to post something every single day in July. I am finishing up tagging clothes for a consignment sale in a few weeks. I have over 60 hairbows to complete (this month). I need to make 2 flower girl dresses for a wedding in August. I need to finish my Virtue Training Bible so I can write my review & post my giveaway! We have started remodeling the dining room. The tin for the new roof was delivered yesterday. We were supposed to pick up a pool yesterday as well, but that fell through which means we are still on the lookout for a pool. Planning on getting the roof on tonight & tomorrow. We are going camping next week. Austin has a trip to Raleigh next week. I have a vendor show in 2 weeks. Cheer leading starts back up next week. And I really need to start planning our school year!

So with all those things to choose from, you would think I would take advantage of the "extra" time while the kids were gone. Nope! You would be wrong! Instead, I have laid Logan down for bed a few minutes early & have truly enjoyed the quiet!

Now, excuse me, I'm sure that something needs to be done!

We've Got Ears, Say CHEERS

To celebrate Logan's 2nd birthday, we turned out house into a Clubhouse - Mickey Mouse's Clubhouse! We enjoyed the evening with friends and family.

Logan loves Mickey Mouse and he asks to watch it frequently. Although it sounds more like "Me Mouse".

We grilled Hot Diggity Dogs (hot dogs) and Clubhouse Burgers (hamburgers). We had Pete's Pasta (pasta salad), O Toodle Doodles (cheese doodles), Daisy's Garden Treats (veggies with ranch dressing), Donald's Deviled Eggs, & Goofy Ka-bobs (fruit with fruit dip).

To satisfy our sweet tooth, Mouse ka Cookies (Oreos dipped in red chocolate with added ears), Mickey Cakes (cup cakes from a friend), & Minnie Pops (red velvet & chocolate cake layered with cream cheese icing & crushed Oreos) were pretty yummy!

Of course, we couldn't eat any of these goodies without a little help from our Mouse ka Tools.

I had fun planning my baby's party & enjoyed surprising everyone with the fun food names, but the highlight of my night  was when Logan crawled up in my 91 year old grandpa's lap to play his new guitar. He sat there for awhile, content to play music & talk about cows.

If I Don't Like It.....

Oh how I HATE HATE HATE those little words!

One of my children has probably just asked what we are having for supper. It never ever fails, especially if it is something new or different, someone always says "what if I don't like it?".

You eat it ANYWAY!

I have made some sort of effort to make sure there is food in this house. I have made an effort to provide a hot meal. And I have made a huge effort to find something new, fun, healthy, & pleasing to everyone.

Do you have any clue how hard that is?

Obviously my children don't!

I am SOOOOO reminding them of this when they have kids!

2012 in Review

No, it can't be time AGAIN! Really, another year has already flew by?! It seems it has.

Somehow, the older I get, the faster time wants to go. Why is that? When I was young & anxiously awaiting something, it took F O R E V E R, but now that I am trying to slow down, I can't!

2012 was filled with ups & downs, laughter & tears, triumphs & disappointments. G.R.A.C.E has reached out & encouraged more people than I could imagine.  Blessed Boutique is allowing me to do what I enjoy while still being home.

In a nutshell this year we have had 1 child stop believing in Santa & the tooth fairy, 1 child lost their first 2 teeth, 1 child to take their first steps. We have bought a dirt bike, a go cart, a 4 wheeler, a truck, a new engine for the Suburban, & a new washer & dryer. We have played football, soccer, baseball, & cheer leading. We have dealt with RSV - twice, ear infections - too many to count, a gash in a head, a leg almost sawed off, bumps, bruises, black eyes, & bloody noses. We have left one church in order to follow God's will for Justin to become a pastor.

Thankfully, through it all, I can still say that I am BLESSED! God is good!

Here are a few of my favorite posts from the past year -

Hey Can You Help these Old People

Is it Really That Important  

What Will You Leave Behind

If You Never Did Then You Should. These Things are Fun & Fun is Good.

Something More

Happy Birthday Austin

The End of an Era

My Sweet Logan is 1

When Did He Grow Up

The Good, The Bad, & The Ugly - Part 1

The Good, The Bad, & The Ugly - Part 2

A Higher Calling

Tales of a Homeschool Nothing ~ School Pictures

Reviving Your Marriage

The Marriage Project

20 More Years

Whose Dream is This

The Elf on the Shelf

Here's to the close of 2012 & the promise of 2013!

Whose Dream is This?

When I was little, the only thing I EVER remember saying I wanted to do when I grew up was make a difference to someone. My future ideas of an occupation might have changed as quickly as the seasons blew by, but I KNEW, deep down, somehow, I needed to make a difference in someone's life. I had dreams of teaching, nursing, a corner office, a musical career, fame, fortune, big city living - you name it & I probably thought about it!

The one thing I didn't think about was being a mom. Oh, I knew I wanted kids, but that never defined my future. I most certainly never dreamed that I would be a stay at home mom let alone a homeschool mom. And if someone had told me I would be a pastor's wife, I would have laughed until I cried. Nope - that wasn't my dream for the future.

Well, let me just say that priorities change drastically the older you get & whoever thinks that God doesn't have a sense of humor, needs to think again.

So here I am. I no longer dream of fame, fortune, or big city living. I still have big dreams, but now they revolve around my husband, my kids, my farm, & God's will.

Does that mean that every day is sunshine & roses?

Sweetheart, you obviously don't know me if you think my life is that grand!

We struggle. We fuss. We fight. We worry. We cry. We battle periods of attitude, guilt, rage, selfishness, & depression. But we also laugh, smile, love, & praise.

Somedays I wonder if this is really what my life is meant to be. I mean really. How am I supposed to cook, clean, teach, play, do laundry, balance the checkbook, run an at home business, spend time with my husband, explore my own interests, not neglect my friends, & find time for God? HOW? There are not enough hours in the day!

Day in, day out brings the same story again. Wake husband up before the sun even considers rising, fall back asleep. Wake up to the baby crying, begging PLEASE go back to sleep, it's still dark. Throw clothes on because even if the baby did go back to sleep, I'm wide awake. Play on Internet a few quite minutes. Try to wake kids up, occasionally resulting to anger when they don't listen. Face the breakfast dilemma again. Battle through school with cries of "I don't know how to do this" "I don't want to do this" & "I need your help". Get a few chores done during baby's nap, only to have him make a bigger mess when he wakes up. Lunch. A little more school followed quickly by "Please go outside & leave me alone". Maybe get in a little exercise while the baby lays down again & then if I'm lucky a shower as well. Hubby's home but he has a ton of stuff to do as well. "Honey, what's for dinner?" Oh crap, I have no idea! Hmmmmm, maybe I can find something the kids will actually eat. Bathtime & finally bedtime. I feel like I'm stuck in a Suburbia version of Groundhog's Day.

Does this mean that I hate my life?

Absolutely not!

Does this mean that I wish I could swap lives with someone else for a few days?

Sometimes!

Does this mean I fantasize about a deserted tropical island where children are not allowed?

Quite frequently!

Does this mean that I need to be more thankful for the season I'm in right now because time passes far too quickly?

Most certainly!

Do you ever wonder what in the world you were thinking when you signed on for this whole motherhood thing?

Sister, you are not alone. But remember, you are BLESSED!

Amongst all the dirty dishes, smelly laundry, sticky floors, buckets of Lego's, & chaos that is motherhood, you are doing the one job that NO ONE else can do! You were chosen specifically by God to mother your children & be a wife to your husband!

Keep on, keeping on!

1st Corinthians 10:31 "Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God."

Oh, & in case you were wondering...I did achieve my dream! I am making a difference in my kids lives everyday! I may not bring home a typical paycheck, but hugs, kisses, & crowns are worth far more than mere money!

Sometimes we just need reminding that "For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away." & "To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven"

Festival of Lights

Two years ago, my little family took off to Pilot Mountain to check out a Christmas light display. I can't remember how we found out about it, but it was well worth the trip. You actually get to walk through these lights.

Its been a few years (I'm not even sure if Makenzie was born yet) since we have been to Tanglewood. There's just sooo much hype & sooo much traffic that it doesn't top our list of fun festive things to do. Well, we decided to go this year.

Let me just say that well into the first hour of waiting with an overly tired toddler who was having a fit to get out of his car seat, two kids who thought it would be fun to repeatedly climb & flip over the back seat of my Suburban, alternately whine that they had to PEE, & occasionally freak out at the police officers directing traffic because they were no longer buckled, (no worries - we were off the main road & in stand still traffic) & a husband who choose really cheesy Christmas songs to play, I was wondering what had possessed me to even suggest this adventure.

That all gave way to sheer bliss at watching all three of my babies cram into the front seat onto Daddy's & Papa's laps so they could see better.

Sometimes we forget too easily what it is like to see the amazement of our world through innocent eyes!

When Forever is no Longer Forever

I've heard so many people debate whether divorce really affects children or not. I have always had my own opinions & convictions about this topic.

The Bible clearly states that God wants a marriage to last forever. He only gives 2 acceptable reasons for divorce - adultery & irreconcilable differences in religious beliefs. Now, He's not talking about a mere 1 time occurrence of cheating here, He's talking about over & over & over again without any regard for saving the marriage or attempting to change one's habits. God also doesn't mean petty little spats & disagreements over what you think is right or wrong. This is clearly when one spouse is saved & the other has hardened their heart so much that it is disrupting your everyday lives. Then, & only then, does God give "permission" for divorce. Does that mean He approves? Absolutely not, but He understands.

Regardless of what the Bible says, I know that many, many people that choose to leave their spouse. As humans, we have come to accept this as normal. Sometimes, we try to convince them to work it out. Sometimes, we say they are better off. Most often, it doesn't even cause us to falter.

How sad is it, that we live in a society where we throw away the person we pledged our undying affection to just as easily as we throw out last week's leftovers? We have truly become an unfeeling, uncaring nation of people.

Back to the original statement. I know far too many children that have been devastated when divorce comes knocking at their door. Questions of "Why me", "What did I do wrong", "How can I fix this", "Will mom/dad still love me", "Does true love still exist" circulate faster than a Texas tornado in spring.

Let me just say that these feelings of inadequacy do not cease with age.

By now, you might be asking yourself if I have ANY idea what I am talking about. Well, yes & no.

My parents have been married 36 years. That seems like a lifetime in today's time frame. 36 years is a major accomplishment any way you look at it.

I have been saying for years that I have no idea how or why they have stayed together. Do they fight that often? Nope, they hardly ever fight. Even growing up, I hardly ever say them disagree. But you know what else I never saw? Affection. Sure my dad would kiss my mom good night & tell her he loved her, but that's about the extent of it.

My mom finally dropped the bomb on me last week. She is no longer in love with my dad & hasn't been happy for years. Even though it wasn't a huge surprise to me, it still hurt. I mean it HURT. Thinking something myself verses hearing it out loud has two totally different results.

Of course my responses consisted of "Are you sure", "Have you told him how you feel", "Are you leaving him", "Have you considered counseling", "Have you tried making more effort to do things together". In a nutshell, she has no desire to work things out.

These are my PARENTS. How do I respond to that? I'm NOT supposed to be their counselor!

So when I talked to my dad, I told him they needed to talk & she wasn't happy. He already knew this. The marriage has been dead for years. It turns out that me & my kids are the glue holding it together.

Now does this mean that I get the honor of joining the ever increasing number of children from broken homes? Who knows.
In a way, I always have been. I've referred to them for too many years to count as either mom or dad, hardly ever both of them. Many people already think they are divorced because they are never together.

They may follow through with divorce. They may continue on pretending for everyone else. Or they may fall back in love. I'm not holding my breath for any of these.

I DON'T WANT TO BE THE GLUE!

That means when I fall apart, everything else does too!

He's Still Working on Me

I have an old VBS t-shirt that says He's still working on me. I like to drag it out every now & then as a reminder that "it took Him just a week to make the moon & the stars, the sun & the earth, Jupiter & Mars. How loving & patient He must be because He's still working on me."

On any given day that you swing by my house, I can assure you that you might find cookies & cereal crushed up on the floor, toys recklessly abandoned, the contents of a drawer haphazardly emptied, books scattered all over the table & most likely the couch as well, dirty dishes in the sink, the trash can over flowing, last nights pot still on the stove with the remains of supper still in it, the kitchen floor in desperate need of mopping,  several loads of laundry covering my bed, several more loads hiding my bathroom floor waiting to be washed, 4 pairs (or more) of shoes just begging to be tripped over on the front porch, Logan in his pajama shirt & diaper, Austin without his shirt on, Makenzie with her hair in knots, & me with my hair falling out of the half attempted pony tail. And most of the time, you will notice many of these things, if not all of them, at the same time.

I love company and I welcome you to stop by, but if you want to save your sanity & enjoy a peaceful environment, you might want to call first. Um, 2 weeks before you want to come over should be sufficient. At least then, we can all be dressed & presentable & I can have a pathway cleared to the couch. I might even find room for both of us to sit down on it. But, if you are brave of heart & don't scare too easily, then, by all means, live dangerously & come on over!

God has a lot of work left to do with me. I want to spend more time in prayer, studying my Bible, playing with my kids, & teaching them life lessons. I want time alone with my husband & time alone by myself. I want to squeeze in those 3 miles again during the baby's nap. I want to enjoy the beauty in simplicity & lose myself in a book. I want a vacation & a bigger house. I have a business that needs tending, hairbows that need creating, tutus that need making, & a blog that needs writing. I have meals to cook, everything to dust, laundry to wash, shirts to iron, coupons to clip,  & groceries to buy. I have animals that need feeding, a yard that needs flowers, a pond that needs filling, & ants that need killing. I have football games to attend & cheerleaders to coach. I have diapers that must be changed, a 7th birthday party to plan, & a 10 year old attitude that needs adjusting. I have a new congregation of people looking for support from their pastor's wife. I have lessons to plan, devotions to read, & Contenders to lead. I have bills to be paid & not nearly enough money to cover our needs & our wants. I have friends to see & memories to make. I have burdens to bear & encouragement to give.

As you can see, I have a lot on my plate & no where near enough room for it. God has a purpose for my insanity. He is working a miracle in my life. I can't see the final picture now, but I know, one day, I will finally become all that He wants me to be. Until then, don't expect perfection because you won't find it here. Love me for who I am, with all of my faults & failures.

Summer Time & the Living's Easy

Hello Blogger World! Have you missed me?!?!

I'm sorry. I haven't felt very "noteworthy" lately. I still don't, but let me just recap the insanity.

June was CRAZY BUSY! Youth Tent Revival, Logan's Birthday Party, Vacation Bible School, baseball, camping, gardening, cook outs, tutu dresses, & Play Station parties are just some of the things that went on in those 30 days that FLEW by! Even through the overwhelming fun, not to mention the HEAT, I blinked & it was gone.

Speaking of the heat - wow, just WOW. Just in case you have been hiding under a rock somewhere obviously far far away from the record breaking heat, here is a video reminding you. (Disclaimer: I have no idea what else this website offers. I did not research it. I just thought the video was neat) So needless to say, triple digits has limited our trips to the pool. Hmm- sounds contradictory, huh? Yeah well, I like to BREATHE when I step outside.

We have also dealt with sickness upon sickness. Repeated ear infections, Roseola, chronic coughing, & colds - ugh, really, its not time for that!

I had really BIG intentions & hopes for this summer as far as how much we would get done with school ........ YEAH RIGHT! If we have even read a book together as a family, we have done good! I'm ashamed to admit that! Every bit of my desire & motivation disappeared. Oh well, that's the beauty of homeschool, right? (I hope)

On the other hand, I have been completely immersed in reading for the past month or so. I LOVE to read & I have always been able to lose myself in a good book. Unfortunately, I don't have the free time to indulge in this passion as often as I want to. I have taken advantage of the little extra free time & the more relaxed scheduling that comes with summer. There have even been a few times that I have had to DRAG myself away from a book in order to accomplish anything!

So here's to summer. May you enjoy those special indulgences that we too often forget about - catching fireflies, watching the first stars twinkle to life, hearing a child's delight at running through the sprinklers, the sweet satisfaction of "ping" when that jar seals, & sipping lemonade on the front porch with friends. Before you know it, the easy pace is gone & the race is back on.

Homeschooling is NOT Enough

Why did you do it?

Many of us decided to homeschool our children to offer them a better education. We wanted them to have more opportunities. We wanted to ignite a passion in them for life long learning.
Many of us wanted to have more control over our beliefs & values.
Many of us wanted to shelter our kids from the evils of the world.
Many of us just wanted to spend more time with our kids.

The majority of us fall within several of those categories!

We spend so much time picking out the perfect curriculum, the most promising activities, the most prestigious co-op, & the most personal support groups. We teach reading, writing, Algebra, Latin, guitar, Botany, the Civil War, & everything in between. We spend hours planning & perfecting each year.

Then our kids grow up, move out, & somehow, somewhere, they no longer believe what we thought they would believe.

HOW DID THAT HAPPEN?!?!
We have entered into the Graduate Generation. We have, for the first time since public school became readily available, started cranking out young people who have spent the majority of their entire lives under the direct instruction of mom & dad.

Shouldn't they be exactly what we want them to be? Shouldn't they believe what we believe? Shouldn't they think they way we think?

HAH! NO! These first generation homeschool kids are still their own people. They are individuals who think for themselves, who make choices that they have to live with, who make mistakes just like we did.

So how do we ensure that they don't stray too far from the hopes & dreams that we had laid out for them?

We need to make sure that we teach them about God. They need to know WHY we believe the way we do. They need to develop a heart knowledge, not just a head knowledge! We are only 3 (possibly less) generations away from apostasy. Our 1st generation were true pioneers in faith. Their beliefs ran deep & were evident in everything that they did. The 2nd generation usually following in their parents footsteps. They know what to do, but they aren't really sure why they do it. By the 3rd generation, too often, they no longer care.

Teaching school at home is not enough if we don’t teach our children about God!
We need to truly disciple our children.
To disciple – the student becomes like the teacher.
"The disciple is not above his master: but every one that is perfect shall be as his master." Luke 6:40
"The disciple is not above his master, nor the servant above his lord." Matthew 10:24
Its hard to expect our kids to be something that we aren't.
Its not enough to just teach them our values & beliefs, we need to teach them why we believe the way we do! Make sure they know the difference between God's commandments, the principles of the church, & the preferences of your family. If something is not in God's word, but your family believes in it, make sure they know that.

We have to learn to let go. The trickiest time in a relay race is passing the baton off to the next person.
When they pass from teens to adults – hand off the baton, don’t throw it at them the way the world does, don’t put the baton in their hand only to continue to hold on while running with them. Entrust them with it. If they drop it, its ok. Pick it up & start again!

We need to express joy & delight with our kids instead of always trying to improve them.
Are you guilty of loving our kids without truly liking them?
We love Christ because He first loved us! Do the same with your kids. Show them unconditional love, respect, & trust & they will return it to you!

Be sure to check out Hal & Melanie Young in their adventures towards Raising Real Men!

Happy Birthday Austin

Saturday April 13, 2002 at 7:24pm, my life changed dramatically! Austin Dale Bauguess came screaming into the world. He was the most beautiful sight I had ever seen. I cried with relief, nervousness, & terror as I laughed with joy, wonder, & amazement at this tiny little baby on my chest.

I was clueless!

I thought I would have it all together. I thought I would be the perfect mom. I thought I would know what to do in any situation. Man, was I wrong!!

It didn't take me long to figure this out either. But somehow, I have managed to keep him relatively safe for 10 years..... Yes, I just said 10 years!

When did that happen? I feel almost like Rip Van Winkle. It seems that these years have passed by without me realizing it.

My chubby little buddy who would scream if we quit feeding him & loved to ride 4 wheelers & go fishing is now my very handsome, almost too skinny young man who barely takes enough time to eat & still loves to ride 4 wheelers & dirt bikes & go fishing. In fact, Austin spent the biggest part of his birthday fishing with his daddy.

I am proud of the person he is growing up to be (please remind me of that when we are having "one of those days")! He loves to tinker around & build things. He has a huge imagination. He is passionate about his chickens & is a great help around the farm! He still loves serving God.

Some memories I cherish, some things I wish I had done differently, some days I would like to relive, but all in all, its been a good 10 years!

Now if I can just figure out how to slow down the next 10 years!